Addie & Kye adventure

[Addie Lockett]

(( www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=94653531 ))

Addie's new therapist had this 'great' idea that she needed to 'overcome her feelings of fear and doubt' over her sexual assault by finding a way to tolerate being near the area where it happened.She didn't know that it was such a good idea for her to go on her own with nobody there to sort of push her forward. She couldn't personally think of one solid reason for her to go through with this but she knew that everything else that she did in therapy helped so she was willing to give it a chance. She just didn't know who to invite! She would have gone for the obvious like Isabel but she knew that the woods freaked her out and her mother would ask far too many questions. She wanted someone who was going to give her the distance that she needed while still maintaining some level of closeness.

Which was why she chose Kye over anyone else that she knew - he was a friend but not the overly touchy feely type who was going to coddle her and say 'oh I'm so sorry'. She didn't even tell him where they were going or why but that was mostly because she had no idea how to even find the words to say that. 'Oh hey wanna go to the spot where my dad raped me and took my virginity while he was high? Cool, I'll buy the jerky'? Yeah.. That just wouldn't work for her and probably not for him either. She was surprised that he was so willing to go on this 'adventure' with her when she'd told him very minimal details other than that she was taking him out of the city and deep into the woods. Didn't he have any fear that she could literally murder him and hide the body out here without anyone noticing?

She actually wouldn't be surprised if there had been murders down this way. The wild animal population likely kept the bodies so close to feed their packs that it wouldn't be difficult to hide something like that. "I bet there's bodies out here." She said quite casually as she drove through the swerving areas until they got to the parts deeper where the roads stopped. She wondered to herself how they'd decided to stop the paved path. Had they simply gotten lazy? Or did they realize that anyone who went this far out didn't want to be found? She knew that her thoughts were incredibly morbid right now but she just couldn't shake the feeling as she neared the place where she thought that her life changed for the worst.

She didn't hate her father for what he'd done but he had made a sexual relationship for her impossible. She couldn't imagine herself trusting a man to not hurt her when he'd violated so much. She sometimes even thought back to those moments and wished that he'd left her out there to die. She didn't understand why he hadn't.. Nobody would have known that it was him. She would have been so much better off dead. "We're almost there.." She could feel the ball of nerves building in her stomach and she was so thankful for him being right there next to her so she couldn't chicken out on this like she so desperately wanted to.

What kind of an idiot was she to come back here? She almost wanted to just throw up when she finally parked and she could suddenly see it so clearly like it was yesterday. She could practically feel his hot breath on her skin as he reached under her skirt and whispered, "This is what all dads and daughters do.. Don't you want to make me proud?" She closed her eyes for a second and inhaled deeply before turning back to Kye, "Are you ready to explore?"

[Kylar Fox]

www.polyvore.com/cgi/set?id=94620024

Kye was glad to be spending time with Addie outside of school. Seeing as the fair wasn't exactly in his comfort zone with all the couples and happy fucks running around that made his mischievous side shine through. He even went so far one time to go and duct tape two people's faces together that were kissing in the park. There wasn't really a reason that seeing people happy made him so sick, he just kind of.. was. Maybe it's because, deep down, he wanted something like that. More likely than not, he wouldn't be forever alone, but for now, he wanted to keep his little icy soul all to himself.

He wasn't the least bit worried or concerned that Addie was taking them in the middle of nowhere. He'd asked his aunt and uncle if he could borrow their camping tent, two sleeping bags and a few blankets. He'd also made sure to grab a box of matches, some snacks and a cooler full of drinks along with a six pack that he'd stolen from the fridge just in case she wanted one. She seemed a little off today and he wasn't exactly sure why but he assumed it was something personal and he wasn't going to be that friend that stuck his nose where it didn't belong.

When they'd reached the destination, Kye stayed inside for just a moment more before looking to Addie with a grin. "I'm always ready for an adventure." He said, swinging open the door and hoping out, pulling his back pack out with him and slipping each strap over his shoulders. "So, I take it that I'm following you since I don't know where the Jesus titties we are.." He laughed and quickly shook his head side to side before walking around to meet her. He pinched his eyebrows together for a second and tilted his head slightly. "Hey~" Kye said, waiving his hand in front of her face. "Earth is calling Addie back.."

[Addie Lockett]

Addie wasn't really 'there' all the way today. She felt bad for not being a better adventure hostess but she just couldn't get herself to focus fully on him and what was going on between them. Was something even going on between them? He probably just saw her as a friend so she wasn't going to put too much hope into the idea of them happening. Why waste all that energy on a crush that wouldn't work out? She could risk losing a really great friend because of it and that was the last thing that she wanted to happen. She'd rather be his friend and watch him eventually love someone else than admit her feelings and lose him forever. He deserved a nice normal girl who didn't have more issues than Cosmo magazine.

"Oh um..." She didn't know where to begin their little adventure. The spot where it happened? The lake where she cleaned up? Or the spot where she begged him not to do it? She kicked some dirt on the ground before taking his hand and leading him to the exact spot where everything happened. She felt so strange to be standing there.. She could feel her chest tighten up and her palms start sweating so she released his hand. She couldn't let the panic take over this soon.. She couldn't lose her cool in front of someone as calm as Kye. He didn't seem like he'd do well with a big emotional scene. "Do you ever go somewhere that something terrible has happened and just feel it? Like.. feel what the person went through and all the panic takes over and you just want to scream?"

She didn't want to freak him out so she didn't explain what she meant. How do you tell someone you were sexually assaulted right in this exact spot? That she could still remember digging her hands into the dirt as she screamed for mercy? That she'd wanted nothing more than to just die right there to escape the torture? She was trying to hold back tears so she didn't dare say another word. He didn't seem stupid enough to believe that her voice cracking meant that she was about to burst into tears not allergies or some other lame excuse that she could make up.

[Kylar Fox]

The idea to ask her what was running through her head was getting harder and harder to avoid. He really didn't want to pressure her into saying something that she might regret or not want him to know, but slowly, his curiosity was growing. Kye knew her too well that she wouldn't just randomly pick this spot in the middle of bum-fuck-Egypt to go on an adventure. Unless she was bringing him here because she wanted to investigate the hiker that had gone missing last week.. Then that would change things a little bit. That's secretly one of the reasons that he agreed to come with her today. How cool would it be if they found the guy's body? Or would that just scare the utter shit out of him realizing that the killer, animal or not, could still be in the area..

When she grabbed his hand, he snapped back to reality in a jiffy, unsure how he felt about the act but didn't find himself protesting.. which was odd. Instead, he was accepting her gesture and holding hers too. How could one person be so overpowering on his damn emotions that he thought he'd long gotten rid of? As they walked, Kye occasionally glanced at her, noting how she was starting to become nervous the further they went.

He wondered if she felt his hand twitch and tense just the slightest bit when she asked if he had ever been somewhere that you knew something bad happened. The first image to flash in his brain was back when he was a child and when he woke up from falling off the bed and saw his mother in a pool of her own blood because of something that he'd accidentally done. The second image was seeing his dad hanging and the paramedics and police officers taking him down. Then their graves.. then the funerals, then the feeling of anger and hurt and everything he had neatly tucked away flooded out and he had to clear his throat to keep from losing it.

Kye knew Addie knew that he was troubled. All he returned towards her question was a simple, "My brain, sometimes." He nervously adjusted his beanie over his ears with his free hand and then grew quiet as he looked around to the spot that they stopped at. "Why? What brought that up?" He asked before looking at her straight-on. With his free hand, he put it on her free arm and asked in such a quiet yet sweet tone, "Are you okay, Addie?"

[Addie Lockett]

Most people didn't know the story of Addie's virginity and that was exactly how she liked it. Her mother knew details here and there and her therapist knew the majority of it but she typically stuck to the facts. She rarely got into the emotional aspect of it or how it affected her daily life. She didn't want to be the vulnerable girl who lets her past hold her back but something about Kye's tone made her want to spill everything so she did."This is the spot where he raped me." She began with a small sigh as she kicked the dirt under her feet. She usually left out the overly graphic stuff but she found herself describing every little detail from the feeling of his hand slipping up her skirt to the way that his voice made her feel sick to her stomach as he asked if she liked it like that.. Did his little whore like it like that.

"I begged him for mercy... I just wished that he would leave me out here to die or just take me out of my misery and do it himself. He laughed... I was laying right here sobbing and bleeding and he laughed. I can't get it out of my head because he seemed so proud of himself like he'd just taught me a lesson or something. I still wish he'd killed me sometimes." She hadn't admitted that to anyone not even really to herself. "I know how it feels to not like what goes on in your own head if that's what you meant earlier." Her life was different because of her father being a sick twisted bastard. She couldn't even stand the sight of her naked body because she only saw a skin that somehow seduced him. She couldn't imagine ever letting someone do that to her again even if sex was apparently amazing.

"Are you still my friend?" She sounded near tears again as she looked from him to the ground. What if he saw her as some silly little crazy girl? He didn't need that in his life. He needed someone who was stable.. someone normal and kind who would be able to give all of herself to him without thinking about their past. "I... I'm sorry." She was thinking back to every word that she'd expressed to him and she was feeling incredibly guilty. Who was she to unload on him like that? He had his own issues and he didn't need to add her's to that list.

[Kylar Fox]

Had Kye just heard her right? That she had taken him to the spot where something traumatic had happened to her? So that's what she meant when she was talking about bad places with bad memories and feelings. She meant this spot. She meant her. Kye dropped his eyes to the ground below and pursed his lips. For her to share something so intimately private with him, he knew that meant that she had a lot of trust in him. He wasn't sure if he wanted her to trust him that much solely because he always seemed to let people down.

Kye continued to listen as she spoke and he couldn't help but feel anger towards the man. Who would be so sadistic as to do this to an innocent girl? Who was that demented? It was taking everything in him not to get back in the truck, drive to his house and put a bullet in his head, which for a second, Kye seriously considered. Then the thought about how Addie was feeling. Surely she was vulnerable right now which gave him a sense of higher power.. not in a controlling way, but more like a.. maybe he could do something right this time around.

When it sounded like she was finished with her awful story, Kye looked up from the ground as he tried to act unphased. He touched his hand to his face and said, "Well... I'm glad you didn't die." Was that too cold for such an obviously sensitive situation? He thought it was a good way to show that he wasn't going to flake out on her just because she was imperfect. He liked imperfect. 

He almost laughed at her question about him still being her friend. He shook his head in amazement and then smiled.

"Definitely." He said with a final, reassuring nod. He took a second to let her breathe before he found himself doing something that wasn't exactly familiar to him.. he went in to hug her. His tone softened as he pulled away, leaving his hands on her shoulders. "It takes more than a hindered girl and her tragedy to fend me off." He said, a small grin still on his lips. "Hey.. don't move.. I'll be right back.."

Kye ran back towards the truck and gathered up the other things he'd brought with them for their adventure. When he returned, he dropped them all and put his hands on his hips. "The best way to get over shit in your life is to take that fucker by the horns, right? Right.." Kye said, starting to open the bags and set up the tent. "So that's what we're going to do.. Take a bad place and make a good memory out of it. Besides.. what's a woodland adventure without a home base?" 

[Addie Lockett]

"Well... I'm glad you didn't die."

Addie actually laughed at that little comment. She couldn't believe that she had been so scared to tell him when he had reacted so calmly. She almost expected this big dramatic thing where he told her that she was dirty, a freak, how she was fat and how she should just do everyone a favor and take her own life before she could cause anyone any sort of inconvenience. It had unfortunately happened at her old school and got intense enough over time that she'd actually had to leave that school and transfer here. "I'm glad that I didn't die, too." She was really lying though and it was obvious. She'd already admitted that earlier so she didn't know why she was even trying to act like she enjoyed her life now. She was, however, a little bit happier when she heard him say that he was still her friend.

The idea of him wanting her as his friend even when she was a screwed up silly little victim was absolutely heartwarming. She appreciated that he was the kind of person who would tell how he really felt even if it wasn't positive so she knew that he would tell her the truth if he no longer wanted anything to do with her. She also knew that physical contact wasn't really something that either of them seemed very fond of which made his hug even more meaningful. He was giving her all of these confusing feelings that she didn't know what to do with. She'd never felt like this before about anyone! If something between them happened then he would literally be her first 'real' boyfriend. She raised a brow when he told her to wait there but she decided not to question it and she didn't dare move a muscle. What was the worst that he could surprise her with?

She was both shocked and relieved when he brought the stuff back with him.Was he serious right now? She didn't know how comfortable that she was going to be tonight but she was willing to give it a shot. What kind of a life would she be living if she let her fears control her every move? Which was also why she moved closer to him and gently moved his face to look at her's, "Hey.. Don't say anything about this, okay?" She wasn't talking about her rape and that was obvious as she planted a gentle kiss on his lips. It wasn't anything huge or intense but she felt incredible passion from it for all five seconds before she casually pulled away. She was going to act as if she hadn't just put their amazing friendship on the line.

How could she be so stupid? He was so great! She should have just accepted that a friendship was all that she'd have with him instead of attempting to rock the boat like this. "So um... do... do you want to explore or...?" She trailed off nervously as she tried to think of ways to make sure that the kiss didn't come up in conversation. He probably liked some hot brunette without a tragic story... which is exactly what he deserved. Perfect might get awfully boring sometimes but at least it's not insane, right?

[Kylar Fox]

Kye didn't care if she was uncomfortable staying in this spot for the night. He had learned from a lot of his own persona experience that dreading something with a bad memory was the worst thing you could possibly do and the best thing to fix it was to replace it with something good. Add a little light in the darkness. Kye never really thought of himself as good, but being here, he had to try and make himself the next best thing even if he was going far out of his way just to see her feel better. As he finished pitching the tent and putting things inside, he kept looking back to see if she was okay. She didn't look it but there wasn't too much that he could do that he would know how to do.

He zipped the tent closed and turned back towards her, brushing his hands together to show that he was done with that task. When he turned around, he was greeted by Addie's face and her telling him not to tell anyone about this whole thing. He happily nodded, assuming she was talking about the information that she'd given him that he was going to keep locked away in the deepest places within. But that's when things took a strange path.. one that he didn't see coming in a million and two years. His knees almost gave out from underneath him the second her lips touched his and he stood there awkwardly until he gave in. Before he was able to realize what all was happening and process the idea that he wanted to kiss her back, she was pulling away from him.

He blushed because he was blushing and he felt like a damn thirteen year old girl seeing their first crush ever. Kye was good at hiding things. He hid the fact that he wanted her to do it again, but he couldn't shake off the heat from his face or the color it had turned. Kye bit his bottom lip and dropped his eyes to the forest floor and then back up at her when she offered to start their adventure. Confused, he eagerly followed behind her, making sure to grab his trusty back pack and nearly stumbling over a stick to catch up to her. "So, wait, that's it?" He asked, now tripping over his own feet and some of the air in front of him. "No explanation... no awkward statement? Nothing?" He asked, now caught up to her and seemingly finding his feet. 

He stepped in front of her, blocking her path and then thinking maybe that was too far so he stepped back a little bit to give her some personal trusting space. "What was that for?" He asked one last time. He wasn't even demanding an explanation, he was just curious. He tilted his head to the side as he tried his best to read her face to find the answer he wanted on his own but she was so difficult to figure out. "Why do I feel like that isn't your usual end for a 'hey thanks for listening' speech?" Whatever her reasoning behind it, he found it strange the feelings that it brought. Kind of like zombies were licking his insides which in other people's heads meant butterflies. "I'm sorry.. I just.. I need to know because my head is running in fifty-three different places right now."

[Addie Lockett]

Addie smiled to herself when he began questioning her reasoning behind the kiss. What did he think that she'd done it for? Didn't he realize that sometimes one friend just gets the urge to kiss another friend? She didn't see why there had to be so many strings attached with everything. Kissing him didn't have to complicate their friendship! She didn't want to have a friends with benefits type relationship but she also didn't want to not be able to kiss him any time that she wanted without a label. Dating would ruin everything that she loved the most about them and their current relationship. She didn't want to start wearing make up!

Well.. She could wear make up and she could put on a nice little dress and look perfectly pleasant but she didn't want to do that for anyone else's benefit. If she was going to spend hours in the mirror getting ready then she wanted it to be for herself and her own benefit. She didn't see why girls believed that they had to impress guys with their clothes and cosmetic products. She rarely wore make up around Kye and typically she was in sweats but he still wanted to hang out with her! How could girls have so little confidence in themselves as humans that they would think that they even needed to do all of that for someone's attention? It wasn't like that would make them a better kisser or have a better personality.

"I wanted to kiss you so I kissed you.. And if I feel like kissing you again then I will because I liked doing it." Her explanation was quite simple and she didn't feel any reason to elaborate on that. Why would she? She had no reason to attempt to awkwardly apologize or make up some lame excuse like it was an accident or she didn't know what came over her. She knew exactly what she had done and she realized that she didn't particularly regret it. She wouldn't regret it even if he got angry and told her that he didn't like it because she knew that taking that risk had involved a confidence that she needed. She'd let too many things and opportunities slip away because she was too scared to do what she wanted to. She didn't want to look back on her and Kye one day and think that she should have done something.. If only she'd acted on her feelings.

"Hey.. You know that hiker who went missing in the area? Do you want to try and find the body?" That wasn't exactly the most romantic thing in the world but she didn't see why they needed to be. If she wanted to have to do only nice couple things with him then she would confess her damn feelings! She knew that eventually her love for sweats and horror movies would come far below her feelings for Kye though since she was already sort of developing stronger, more loving feelings for him. She had never felt something so intense happen so quickly and she sort of liked it.

Who doesn't want to fall in love with their best friend?

[Kylar Fox]

He smiled at her reason and pivoted around so that he was standing next to her again. He'd only taken a few steps before he stopped and stepped in front of her again, this time walking backwards and hoping he didn't trip on a frozen log or something. He put his thumb and index on his chin and furrowed his eyebrows like he was in deep thought before asking her another question. "Well.. if you get to kiss me.. do I get to kiss you?" Kye asked, surprised in himself. He was forward but wasn't he kinda known for being the Grinch of emotions? Just a cold little icebox in the back of someone's refrigerator? 

She made him feel... alive. For the first time in a very, very long time, Kye felt happily content, even without the use of some kind of substance. He'd been without anything for, well, going on two days and as badly as he wanted a fix, he found something a little better.. her. He cracked a little smile and shakily leaned forward to kiss her lips for only a short two or three seconds before his face got hot and he flipped back around and next to her side. 

It wasn't too much longer when she was recommending that they investigate the missing hiker and that instantly peaked his interest. "You know me too fucking well, Addie. Y'know that?" He asked, lacing their hands and fingers together without a second thought. Hopefully she was okay with that because he really really wanted to hold her hand. He'd always given her his arm to hold on to before now, but this just felt more personal to him and he enjoyed it more. "I'd say that there is a good three or so hours before dark.. we'd better get started, Watson!" He said, with a kick in his step. 

He smiled before kissing her cheek and starting to sprint forward, dropping his backpack at the base of a tree and hugging it as if it was the last time he was going to see it. Even without the assistant of limbs or nubs where there used to be one, Kye used his body and leg strength to heave himself up the trunk under he reached the first branch which was, from what he guessed, about thirteen feet off the ground. Kye perched himself on the branch and looked down to Addie. "I don't know if I'm a monkey or a fucking ninja but the view up here is awesome!"