Post by Esme Russel on Jul 31, 2013 19:56:55 GMT -5
Esme just felt drained when she left Dallas and Kevin's apartment - emotionally and physically so. She didn't want to think about what could have happened if not for Kevin stepping in and rescuing her. What if Dallas had raped her while under the influence? She'd never thought that he was that type of person before but now she wasn't so sure what kind of a person that he was. How in the world could he go from being her sweet kind best friend to someone that she didn't even trust? Was it all the drugs or was some of it things that he'd always had deep down? She wanted nothing more than to pretend that none of this had ever happened but she felt so helpless that she knew that she was going to need to tell her husband. She couldn't have hid it anyway even if she didn't struggle to keep herself from crying during the short drive back to their house. She couldn't stop replaying everything that happened in her head and picking out each thing that she had done oh so very wrong.
She'd always thought that she would know what to do if a man tried to overpower her but every bright idea that she had just left her mind when it actually happened. Could he have raped her? Yes. It was so easy for him to get her up against that wall and that look in his eyes would haunt her for awhile. He'd looked so distant, so cold.. So much like he was willing to do whatever he wanted even if it posed a risk to her, her marriage and her unborn daughter. She nearly lost it when she got stopped at a red light on her street and the sick realization came to her once again that she was /this/ close to being a victim. He almost did something that she just wouldn't have been able to forgive or 'get over'. Heaven help her if he had done it and people found out.. Nobody would have forgiven her for accusing someone like him could ever do something like that. Girls like her can't be raped anyway, right?
Her sexual history with him would make anything null and void, right? Had she been sending some kind of vibe that she wanted him to kiss her? She must have been! He wasn't that kind of person. She couldn't help but try to rationalize his behavior in her head so it didn't seem so bad. He hadn't actually raped her! He just pressed her against a wall and kissed her which was totally just.. just something that was her fault. Maybe she was still giving off 'whore' scent and he got confused in his drug hazed state. It felt like an eternity before she finally was pulling into her and Jonathan's driveway and dashing to their bedroom. She didn't even stop to check on Cici! She just needed to sob all over her husband and hear from him that she was being irrational and petty.
She slowly moved onto their bed and gently tried to shake him awake. "Jonathan.. Jon.. We need to talk." She probably should have wiped off her make up first. Her eyeliner and mascara were probably all down her cheeks at this point. "I think I almost forced Dallas to rape me and I'm really scared so you need to wake up and tell me that I'm being stupid." Well wasn't that a lovely thing to wake him up with! It was all her fault though. "I.. It was all my fault.. I'm so sorry," She really did have guilt issues, didn't she?
She'd always thought that she would know what to do if a man tried to overpower her but every bright idea that she had just left her mind when it actually happened. Could he have raped her? Yes. It was so easy for him to get her up against that wall and that look in his eyes would haunt her for awhile. He'd looked so distant, so cold.. So much like he was willing to do whatever he wanted even if it posed a risk to her, her marriage and her unborn daughter. She nearly lost it when she got stopped at a red light on her street and the sick realization came to her once again that she was /this/ close to being a victim. He almost did something that she just wouldn't have been able to forgive or 'get over'. Heaven help her if he had done it and people found out.. Nobody would have forgiven her for accusing someone like him could ever do something like that. Girls like her can't be raped anyway, right?
Her sexual history with him would make anything null and void, right? Had she been sending some kind of vibe that she wanted him to kiss her? She must have been! He wasn't that kind of person. She couldn't help but try to rationalize his behavior in her head so it didn't seem so bad. He hadn't actually raped her! He just pressed her against a wall and kissed her which was totally just.. just something that was her fault. Maybe she was still giving off 'whore' scent and he got confused in his drug hazed state. It felt like an eternity before she finally was pulling into her and Jonathan's driveway and dashing to their bedroom. She didn't even stop to check on Cici! She just needed to sob all over her husband and hear from him that she was being irrational and petty.
She slowly moved onto their bed and gently tried to shake him awake. "Jonathan.. Jon.. We need to talk." She probably should have wiped off her make up first. Her eyeliner and mascara were probably all down her cheeks at this point. "I think I almost forced Dallas to rape me and I'm really scared so you need to wake up and tell me that I'm being stupid." Well wasn't that a lovely thing to wake him up with! It was all her fault though. "I.. It was all my fault.. I'm so sorry," She really did have guilt issues, didn't she?
