Post by Aliana Marie Rice on Jul 31, 2013 19:37:01 GMT -5
January 30, 2013
Dear diary,
I'm never sure on how to start these things, I don't tend to write about my feelings, mostly draw them out, but, I guess I could give this a try.
It's been... months. Months since you left this world and I haven't felt like myself at all since I felt the grip of your hand slip out of mine.
No one has ever meant so much to me and it's hard. It's hard knowing that you won't be here to comfort me.
"Gotta pick myself up, where do I start? 'Cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart."
Yeah, I listen to the Veronicas when I'm upset.
It's hard to smile, pretend to be happy, like everything is so okay when it isn't. And it's pissing me off because I feel like I'm taking it out on everyone, on people who don't deserve it. With you, I was so much better. I don't want to turn into that bitch I used to be before I met you. People think I'm mean for the fuck of it but I'm just angry. I'm angry that you're gone and I'm angry that you aren't coming back.
I'm angry at myself because I can't do anything to fix any of this and I feel like it's all my fault even when it isn't.
I'm never sure on how to start these things, I don't tend to write about my feelings, mostly draw them out, but, I guess I could give this a try.
It's been... months. Months since you left this world and I haven't felt like myself at all since I felt the grip of your hand slip out of mine.
No one has ever meant so much to me and it's hard. It's hard knowing that you won't be here to comfort me.
"Gotta pick myself up, where do I start? 'Cause I can't turn to you when it all falls apart."
Yeah, I listen to the Veronicas when I'm upset.
It's hard to smile, pretend to be happy, like everything is so okay when it isn't. And it's pissing me off because I feel like I'm taking it out on everyone, on people who don't deserve it. With you, I was so much better. I don't want to turn into that bitch I used to be before I met you. People think I'm mean for the fuck of it but I'm just angry. I'm angry that you're gone and I'm angry that you aren't coming back.
I'm angry at myself because I can't do anything to fix any of this and I feel like it's all my fault even when it isn't.
