Crysta's Dorm

[Crysta Ericson]

[Crysta Ericson]

<sup>January 26th 2013. Crysta Ericson sat crossed legged on her bed, chewing on her thumb nail anxiously. On the rumpled sheets in front of her lay a recently used pregnancy test. Never in her seventeen years of life did she think she’d be in this situation. It just wasn’t the way she was brought up, but apparently that didn’t matter. How could she have been so stupid? It wasn’t like she hadn’t had sex education classes! In fact, it can’t have been four months ago that she took sex ed for the second time.
Despite how much Crysta wanted to divert her attention, she couldn’t take her eyes from the still developing test. The box said it would take three minutes, and it was turning out to be the longest three minutes in her life. Not only were her palms sweating and her heart racing, but she was feeling even more nauseous than she had been doing for the past month. There were so many thoughts going through her mind. What would she do if it was positive? What if it was negative? What if it showed negative but it was wrong? That’s why she should’ve bought two tests, but buying one was embarrassing enough. The woman at the store had just given her this pitying look, as if Crysta was this stupid little kid that had spilt paint on the rug. In a way that’s how Crysta felt, she was just a kid, this was a mistake. This wasn’t meant to be her life.
It was honestly no surprise when the two little lines appeared on the test, but Crysta cried all the same. What now? What were you supposed to do? Who did you call first? Did you even call people, or did you meet them and tell them face to face?
Crysta decided to make a phone call.

‘Hello?’
‘Matty?’
‘Crysta, hey, you okay, what’s up?’
‘I’m pregnant’
‘Wait what? Crysta, what did you say?’
‘I’m pregnant, I took a test and it says that I definitely am, and I don’t know what to do’
‘Shit, okay, is it Rusty’s?’
‘Of course it is!’
‘Okay, okay, calm down. I’m coming over’
‘Can … Can you buy another couple tests as well. I wanna make sure’
‘Sure thing kiddo, be there soon’

-
The tears started again as soon as Crysta opened her dorm room door and saw her brother standing there with pregnancy tests, Sunny D and McDonalds. Crysta trusted Matt more than anyone else in the world, even more than she trusted Rusty, and that was the truth. Despite their six year age difference Crysta had always been much closer to Matt than she was to Tyler, who was only three years older than her. After the crying and hugging the siblings sat down on the bed.
‘Have you told Rusty yet?’, Matt asked, crossing his legs and spreading the food out on the bed, helping himself to a couple loose fries. Crysta was grateful for how calm he was being about all this, despite how angry they both knew her mom would be. That was something she didn’t want to think about.
‘Not yet, I wanted to be sure’, Crysta admitted, gingerly picking up a cheeseburger and peeling off the paper, Food was actually the last thing on her mind right now, but she took a bite anyway. The burger was kind of cold, and it looked unappetising, but once she’d swallowed a mouthful she realised how hungry she actually was.
‘I guess that’s a good idea’, Matt replied, nodding his head slightly, ‘Are you going to tell him in person? You could show him the tests’, he added.
‘Yeah, I’ll get him over here, later’, Crysta replied with a small shrug, she wasn’t looking forward to telling Rusty. After all, it was her idea that they shouldn’t use a condom. Well, that wasn’t entirely true; it wasn’t like Rusty put up a big fight against the idea. It was a heat of the moment thing, and to say Crysta regretted it was an understatement.
‘I told Tyler before I came out here’, Matt said, and Crysta opened her mouth to argue but he put up his hand, halting her, ‘I told him not to tell mom, don’t worry’.
Crysta sighed; she hadn’t wanted anyone besides Matt to know, for now at least. Tyler was far more likely to slip up and blurt something out to her mom or dad, seeing as he still lived with them.
A little bit of time went by, and the pair were silent as they slowly worked their way through the food that Matt had brought. The four unopened pregnancy tests lay next to the food on the bed, every time Crysta reached for a fry her hand would brush against one of the boxes and it made her stomach clench.
‘Mom is going to be really mad’, Matt said after a while, Crysta pulled a face and looked down at the bed, ‘I’m sorry, but it has to be said. It’s not going to be pretty Cris. We are meant to be Christian you know. No sex before you’re married … All that stuff’, he carried on, and his cheeks flushed slightly, after all, this was his little sister he was talking to, about sex!
‘I know, I know!’, Crysta replied burying her head in her hands, ‘It’s different though, with me and Rusty. We’ve known each other forever, I love him!’, she looked up from her hands and saw Matt offering her a smile.
‘You know that’s not going to matter to mom though, right?’
‘I know’
‘Are you going to keep the baby?’
The question seemed to come from nowhere and Crysta recoiled a little and frowned.
‘I have to!’, she retorted.
‘Well, you don’t have to, but okay’
‘I do have to Matt, I can’t imagine not keeping it’, she frowned and placed her hands protectively on her stomach, ‘I don’t know if Rusty will want to keep it, but I think … I think I have to’. With that comment the conversation was over, the pair finished up their food Matt gave his little sister a hug and wished her good luck before leaving her dorm and going back to work.

Crysta sat on her bed alone her phone in her hands, a picture of Rusty glowed on the screen, one press of a button and he'd be answering on the other end. Crysta took a deep breath and tapped the screen before hurriedly holding the phone up against her ear.

'Hey Rus, um, do you think you could come over to my dorm, like now please?', she tried not to sound nervous, or upset, 'I need to talk to you'.</sup>

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[Rusty McConaughey]

"I need to talk to you."

The six words no boy ever wanted to hear from his girlfriend. Or anyone, really. That almost always lead to something bad. There was that incredibly rare chance that it lead to something good, but he highly doubted it. Especially due to the tone of her voice. She seemed upset, like she'd been crying. And of course, that struck fear into his heart. Immediately, Rusty began doubting everything he'd said and done to Crysta in the past month. Had he upset her? Did she want to break up? Were they just friends? Did she find someone else?

To say he was scared was an understatement.

"Yea lemme just put on real clothes, I'll be there in five," he answered before ending the call and throwing his phone at a pillow. Angrily, Rusty tossed himself face-first onto his bed and grunted into the quilt, flailing his feet like a child before standing back up and regathering himself. "Fuck," he hissed as he went to his closet and found a plain gray tee shirt. He already had jeans on, and after slipping his feet into a pair of sneakers, Rusty was out the door and down the halls. After reaching and knocking on Crysta's door, he tried the doorknob and let himself in. The site before him was almost heart wrenching, and the air felt stale. The way she was sat on the bed, looking sadder than hell and hopeless as could be. It hurt. And he couldn't help but feel that whatever was wrong was his fault.

Any chance of this being a good 'we need to talk' was completely out of the question now.

"Something wrong?" he asked a bit weakly, but held a strong presence in the doorway with his feet apart and his hands hanging at his sides. Cocking his head a bit to the side, Rusty took the smallest of steps forward and added a loving "Cris?" with a shy smile, trying desperately to make good of this situation. This situation that he didn't even know yet.

[Crysta Ericson]

When Rusty came in to her room Crysta really wanted to fake a smile, pretend that nothing was wrong, because the look on his face broke her heart, and she knew what she had to say would only make things worse. Thing is, it was either tell him now ... Or wait a couple of weeks and he'd probably be able to tell for himself.

'Yeah, kinda ... Come, sit', Crysta motioned at her bed. When Rusty had sat down she took a big, somewhat shaky, breath.

'Before you freak out, this isn't a break up talk', Crysta felt she should point that out, as it was probably Rusty's first guess, 'But I don't know, you might want to break up with me...', she added in a small voice. The thought scared her. Having a baby was scary as it is, but without Rusty ... Well that would be a full on nightmare.

'Um, so ....', Crysta looked down at the bed, her fingers nervously plucking a loose thread from the sheets, 'I'm pregnant'.

[Rusty McConaughey]

Rusty moved forward a bit cautiously, his movements rather robotic. He took a seat at the very edge of the bed, one knee bent and the other hanging over the edge. His back was straight as he sat with his hands on his knees, but he relaxed when she said this wasn't a break up talk. That was a relief. But now he was really scared. If breaking up wasn't scary enough, something else that he didn't know was worse. What could it possibly be that was making her so upset? That she needed to use the words 'we need to talk'? Maybe.. maybe it was nothing at all. Maybe she just wanted to be a little less intimate or something. Maybe they were moving too fast for her. Yea. Maybe that was it.

But it wasn't.

When Crysta said she was pregnant, all the color drained from Rusty's face. Eyes wide, his mouth opened ever so slightly as he sat there, ears pounding and heart stopping. After cocking a brow and a slight twitch of his right eye, Rusty closed his mouth, licked his lips and swallowed hard as he pulled his gaze from hers and dropped it to the bed. He began to rub his hands anxiously up and down his thighs as he stared blankly at the top sheet. He couldn't find any words. None at all. And suddenly, he felt sick because he knew this was his fault.

He kept quiet.

[Crysta Ericson]

The room was silent for what seemed like a very long time, though is can't have been more than five minutes. Crysta decided to let the news sink in, because one look at Rusty made her feel like he needed a moment or two. Words were hard to come by, she got it, but after five minutes of silence she was really ready to hear what Rusty had to say.

'You've gotta say something', Crysta said, although what she wanted him to say she wasn't sure. Maybe just some reassurance. Even an argument would be better than silence. Part of her wanted an argument, she felt angry. Mostly sad, but there was anger in there. Anger at the fact that the two of them were so stupid.

'Rusty, you're supposed to tell me it's gonna be okay, or you can yell at me if you want, I don't care', Crysta said, close to tears once again.

[Rusty McConaughey]

"How could I be so stupid..." was the first thing out of Rusty's mouth. Even after what Crysta had been saying about how he was supposed to say it would be okay or that he could yell at her or something. All he could think of was how stupid he'd been. How completely irresponsible he'd been. How everything was his fault. Everything.

Looking up, Rusty had more of a scared look on his face than anything else. He was sad and angry too, but mostly scared. For her, for him, for everything. He'd just gotten out of such a horrible time in his life, and here he was, a goddamn sophomore in high school, and he'd gotten a girl pregnant. How would that look?

"Crysta, I..." he wasn't sure what to say and bit his lower lip. He lifted a hand at one point, but put it back down and blinked hard. "I'm sorry," he said, almost sounding a bit pathetic as he shook his head at her before putting his hands on her shoulders. "Everything's gonna be fine," he added softly, just so she might hear it. He wasn't sure if it was true, but he figured he needed to hear it just as much as she did.

[Sam Dawson]

'How could we have been so stupid?', Crysta replied with a small smile, wiping away some tears that had seemingly escaped.

When Rusty said everything was going to be fine Crysta was surprised to find she did actually feel a little better, just from hearing those words. Now the news had been delivered, and honestly it could have been much worse. The only thing left to discuss was the baby. What if Rusty didn't want to keep it?

'This sucks, but I think we kinda need to talk about ... The baby', Crysta said, wincing a little at the fact that they had a baby now. No matter how sea monkey like it was at this point.

[Rusty McConaughey]

"I don't wanna get rid of it," Rusty said quite suddenly, looking up from his slump and suddenly seeming like he cared. He had cared before, but now he looked it. Now he didn't just look like some kid that had made a serious mistake. He cared, and it showed. "I don't think I could sleep at night if we got rid of it," he added, shaking his head a bit as he scooted closer to her.

"This is my fault, and I'm going to help you. I don't want you on your own," he said, his hands now on either side of her face. Placing a gentle kiss on her lips, Rusty put his forehead to hers and sighed. "This might sound weird, but I'm sorry I did this to you," he said and couldn't help but laugh at how oddly that had been worded. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't laugh."

[Crysta Ericson]

Crysta couldn't help but laugh too, 'It's okay, but I wouldn't place the full blame on you', she replied with a shrug of her shoulders. After all it did take two people to make a baby. A baby. They'd made a baby... Somehow the news hadn't quite sunk in yet. Crysta felt a quick wave of panic wash over her as she pulled back from Rusty a little trying to keep a smile on her face.

'I'm kind of freaking out a little', she explained, 'I mean, I'm really happy that you're not angry, and that you seem okay, and that we've agreed to keep the baby and stuff but ... You know what this means right, how big a deal this is?'.

Crysta folded her legs and brushed a few empty food wrappers from her bed on to the floor. The floor ... Her dorm room floor. They'd need to move out of the dorms, but with what money?! There were so many new worries popping up in Crysta's mind she could hardly concentrate on just one.

'In seven and a half months we're going to have a baby', she said, her eyes wide, 'Like, literally, have one, it will be here and ... Oh my fuck!', she laughed, clapping her hands over her mouth, 'What're we gonna do?!'.

Despite the seriousness of her question Crysta could no longer keep a straight face. Something about the whole situation seemed so comical, and exciting in some way.